Scammers use romance, dating or friendship to get your trust and your money.

Never trust that someone you only know online is who they say they are. They work hard to make you think the relationship is real, then manipulate you to give them money. They can spend years building your trust.

Scammers use social media, dating or gaming apps and websites to find people looking for love and friendship. They create fake profiles, sometimes of famous people. They might also call or message a lot to make you feel special. This is sometimes called 'love bombing'.

Once you trust them, they might tell you about an urgent problem they need your money for. They might ask you to set up accounts or transfer money they give you. Or they might convince you to use cryptocurrency and invest in a fake scheme they say is real. Either way, the scammer steals your money and disappears, and you don't get it back.

On this page

Signs it might be a scam 

  • The relationship moves fast and they soon say they have strong feelings for you. They 'lovebomb' you, messaging or calling a lot and make you feel very special.
  • The scammer quickly tries to move your chat from a social media platform or online dating to a free messaging platform like WeChat, LINE or WhatsApp.
  • Once there's an emotional connection, the scammer encourages you to make money through different investments, often cryptocurrency. They may offer to spend time 'showing you' how to make 'easy money'. 
  • They may tell you they have an emergency and urgently need your money, or ask you to set up accounts or transfer money they give you.
  • They want you to only trust them and keep things secret. They may try to cut you off from family and friends.
  • There always seems to be some reason they can’t meet in person or video chat. Often they say they're overseas, somewhere remote or their technology isn’t working.

Other 'red flags' or signs to look for

  • Their online profile doesn’t match what they tell you about themselves.
  • They ask you for personal photos, videos or information that could be used against you in the future.
  • The scammer threatens you or gets angry if you ask questions or don’t do what they ask. They may say they'll end the relationship.

Protect yourself

Lots of people look for friends and even find love online.

Just remember that scams are very common.

Keep yourself safe by staying updated on scams, and how to spot people who want your money or identity, not your love.

Never send money to someone you haven't met

  • If they ask you for money, they're probably a scammer. Stop contact straight away and get support.
  • Never send money, card or bank details, personal information or identity documents to someone you only know online, no matter how long you’ve been messaging.
  • Never agree to transfer money for someone else. They may be involving you in a crime called money laundering, and you could be charged with a criminal offence.

Check who's really there

  • Take things slowly when you meet new people online. Ask lots of questions and watch for things that don’t add up.
  • Search for the scammer’s name along with the word ‘scam’ in a search, and look for websites about romance scams in the results.
  • If you have a picture of them, do a reverse image search to find out if the same picture is online in different places, with different names or personal details. 
  • Find out more about different types of investment scams so you can spot red flags, or signs that something is a scam.

Be careful of what you share (and what you don't)

  • Never send nudes or sexually intimate photos or videos to people you don’t know. Scammers can use them to threaten and blackmail you. 
  • Don’t keep an online relationship secret. Tell people you trust about it. It can be easier for someone else to spot things that don't seem right.
  • Think carefully about sharing information about your hobbies, job or family online. Scammers can use this to hurt you, or steal your identity.
  • Find out how to stay safe on different social media platforms.
  • Find out what to do if someone is using your personal information to scam others.

 How to spot a fake profile

They usually have:

  • photos that look too professional
  • photos that are blurry or unclear
  • very little personal information
  • few or no connections to social media accounts
  • few comments, likes or shares on their social media from other people.

Video about relationship scams

Remote video URL

In the world we live in, scams have become commonplace, even in online relationships.

So it's important we talk about romance scammers who build a romance or friendship with you online.

They win your trust, but it's all just an attempt to manipulate you and get your money.

Let's take Lucy here. The person she believes she's in an online relationship with has spent months getting to know her, so she believes the relationship is real.

It's easy for people to hide their true identity online and manipulate the trust and feelings of their victim.

That's why Lucy is actually considering this request for money from someone she's only met online, but it should be a red flag.

Beware if you're asked to transfer money like this or set up accounts for someone else.

They might be trying to steal your money or involve you in money laundering.

And beware if they ask you to invest in cryptocurrency or another investment opportunity.

What's happening here to Lucy are common signs of a scam, and there are other clues that the person you're speaking to has ulterior motives, such as they try to move your chat to a platform that can't be accessed or traced by law enforcement.

Perhaps their online profile doesn't match what they tell you, or they avoid meeting you in person as something always comes up.

They will have a lot of excuses. Or they ask you for personal photos or information that could then be used against you.

The golden rule is never ever send money card or bank details, and never agree to transfer money on someone else's behalf before checking.

You can check online for information about them, but remember scammers can use fake photos, videos, and even websites.

Check their profile.

It might be fake if there's very little personal information about them on there, or there are a few or no connections on their social media accounts.

Do an internet search with their name and the word scam.

Speak to a trusted friend or family member about the online relationship like Lucy's doing.

They might see signs that you don't.

Well done, Lucy.

And finally, if you've been scammed, protect yourself from further harm.

Act quickly.

If you've shared personal details or transferred money, call your bank immediately to stop any further losses.

Change passwords on all devices and online accounts.

If you're experiencing emotional distress, please call, text, or chat with Lifeline.

And cut all contact with the person and report scams to Scamwatch.

Your report will help us to protect others.

And share your story.

The more we talk, the less power scammers have.